Wednesday, July 18, 2012

A Dog-Friendly Work Environment

I’m on the hunt for a job. I currently work remotely for a company located far, far away which means I get to spend lots of time with the dogs. Lots of time. I am looking for something local that requires me to put on real clothes and leave the house every morning.
Part of the reason I got Tiny Dog is that I AM working from home, so I can let her out during the day, meaning she doesn’t have to be crated all day and hold her 4 month old bladder for 9 hours. So as I am hunting for a job, Aimee has asked me more than once, “So when you get a real job, what are you going to do with Tiny?” Excellent question.
One of the companies I applied to is a “dog friendly” environment. Initially, I was really excited. I could potentially bring Tiny Dog to work with me! Then I thought about what a day in the office with Tiny Dog would look like. I think it would go something like this:
8:00 am – Tiny greets everyone in the office.
8:15 am  - Tiny gets committed to puppy jail in my cube.
8:16 am – Tiny tries to eat my computer wires.
8:17 am – Tiny tries to eat my chair.
8:18 am – Tiny tries to eat my purse.
8:19 am – Tiny gives up and lays down.
8:22 am – I realize that Tiny is not quiet because she is being good but instead because she is eating my shoes that I kicked-off while I work.
8:23 am – I put my shoes on top of my desk.
8:30 am – I have a meeting, so I leave Tiny in puppy jail in my cube .
9 am – I return from my meeting to discover Tiny has busted out of puppy jail, broken into someone else’s cube, eaten an entire pile of files, and peed on the floor.
9:03 am – I find TD passed out for her morning nap under someone else’s desk.
11 am – Tiny wakes up from her nap and realizes there are other dogs in the office. She bat dogs all of them.
11:05 am – I have to leave work early because Tiny has been banned from the office on her first day.
Dog-friendly or not, I don’t think Tiny would succeed in an office setting. At least not yet. Maybe when there is a little less chupacabra in her, but right now, it’s just a recipe for trouble. So what AM I going to do with Tiny when I get a real job? I guess she’ll hang out outside. There is no place she loves more than the backyard. 

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